Endless Pursuit for Mom of the Year

  Marriage is the alliance of two people, one whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them. ~Ogden Nash ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Given the hype over the royal wedding (and those horrendous hats), I thought it only fitting to send my own marriage advice to Kate.  I'm fairly sure this is advice she has not received.  1.  Buy a cookbook and a slow cooker.  You'll start off oh so happy to be a new wife and serve your husband's every need.  Then reality sits in and you find yourself with nothing but frozen chicken, a can of soup and absolutely no ambition to cook.   2.  Let him have hobbies.  After all, he gets out of the house and you get to rule the remote!  There will come a day when you believe if you are forced to watch one more episode of Swamp People, you will either become one incredibly cranky woman or an alcoholic.  3.  Have your mother visit.  If ...

"When having a smackeral of something with a friend,  don't eat so much that you get stuck in the doorway trying to get out." ~Winnie the Pooh  ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Malea is quite small for her age.  It's not that she doesn't eat, it's more that she is constantly on-the-go, so I suspect she burns calories in a manner completely unknown to me.  It's a perfect example of how everyone is different.  Maddie was the exact opposite.  I highly suspect this will be the topic of many fights when they become teenagers.   Because of Malea's very small size, this has led to quite an inquisition every time we visit the doctor.  If you have kids, you know how it goes.  You get the percentile info on the little chart and there's the curve to show how much they've grown.  Really, who makes this stuff up?  I'm the parent who has never much cared what "percentile" my child is in.  All...

On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other hand, we can open all our own jars.  ~Bruce Willis -------------------------------------------------------------- I believe most of you know of my husband's DVR addiction. If a man could create a DVR that also loads the dishwasher and dresses children, he'd be one heck of a chick magnet! One of his many shows is the one about Lizard Lick Towing (perhaps that is the name of the show?). I had no idea where this show would lead Madison's thought process. It went something like this. "Mom, today the lady had her baby on Lizard Lick Towing," said Maddie. "Oh?" I replied half paying attention. "Yep," she said rather matter-of-factly. "Mom, how do babies get in your tummy?" NOW she had my attention! Oh geez, really, the where do babies come from conversation? Because of Lizard Lick Towing? I always said I would be honest with her about this but, come on. She'...

  Guilt once harbored in the conscious breast,  intimidates the brave, degrades the great. ~Samuel Johnson ------------------------------------------------------------------------- It's been far too long!  I recently told an acquaintance that writing is my vice.  Given my mood, I'd say I haven't been doing it enough.  Looking back, I guess this started in my teen years.  I had many diaries.  Writing was a release and often the way I dealt with the difficult parts of life.  Consider yourselves warned, this might be a more serious post from me than you are used to but I'm sure many of you can relate on some level. I think I've lost track of when my life became so incredibly busy.  I was raised by two people who taught me to put my heart and soul into everything I do and to do it to the best of my ability.  I'll admit that I am a frequent overextender.  However, I'm convinced, as women, we tend to take on more than we really can han...

Youth is, after all, just a moment, but it is the moment, the spark, that you always carry in your heart.  ~ Raisa M. Gorbachev --------------------------------------------------------------------- Tonight, Madison discovered some old scrapbooks and my high school senior year memory album.  Actually, we were cleaning out and had moved all of our furniture around downstairs to make way for the bar Aaron is building.  These were laying out because I'd meant to put them away in my cedar chest again.  As she thumbed through the pages, instead of being right there with her, explaining every clipping, every photo, every quote she saw, I made my to-do list for tomorrow.  Yep, what can I say?  Mom of the year worthy!  About halfway through the memory book though, she caught my attention.  "Mom," she said, " were you a kid in these pictures?"  Thus began the explanation that I was in high school and how old I was when this book was made....